Quarterly Results
For the quarter "2010 January to March"
House Passes Comprehensive Salvation Reform
The House of Representatives voted today to pass a comprehensive salvation reform package know as the “God’s Not So Tough Act of 2010.”
(more)Jobless Rate Rises Unexpectedly to 527 Percent
Numbers issued by the US Labor Department showed a sudden increase in unemployed Americans, rising sharply from 10.1 percent to 526.8 percent.
(more)DMV to Offer Reduced-Cost Lunches to Poor Drivers
The California Department of Motor Vehicles will soon offer lunches to poor drivers at a reduced cost, or in some cases no cost.
(more)Crashed Spam Server Reveals Sexy Nigerian Dentist Viagra Accounts
A computer failure at one of the largest unsolicited bulk email agencies may seriously damage the reputation of the email spam industry.
(more)Taliban Announces Runoff Election to Replace Captured Leaders
The Taliban political movement is currently accepting applications for key Jihadist leadership positions.
(more)All Life on Earth Perished Months Ago Say Climate Change Experts
A new report says that all life on Earth perished in an unprecedented climate change disaster approximately fourteen weeks ago.
(more)Winter Storm Blankets Washington in Three Feet of Pork
A strong winter storm system has dumped more than thirty-three inches of congressional pork on Washington, DC.
(more)Al Qaeda Recalls Thousands of Defective Bombs
In what consumer advocates are calling a victory for suicide bombers everywhere, Al Qaeda announced today the recall of more than 13,000 wearable explosive devices.
(more)California Legalizes Day Marriage
The state of California has passed a measure legalizing the right of couples to marry for 24 hours or less, also known as “day marriage.”
(more)Congress Passes Health Card Reform
Congressional Democrats mobilized late Friday evening to pass a controversial Health Card Reform package.
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